Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
