This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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