the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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