I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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