he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
he was CRYING into my vagina
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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