btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I am one with the molecules
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
