its not stalking. its research.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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