My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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