almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize