Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize