someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
