Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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