Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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