How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
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All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
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I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize