it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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