Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
