I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My dick has a subreddit
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
