So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
