Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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