First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize