i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
