ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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