you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize