We're like a lot better than the average bears
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
