He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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