well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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