Your tits are I can't wait for
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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