It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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