I can't breathe out the right side of my face
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
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