ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
