My liver just broke up with me...
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
