so explain again why im purple
no
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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