I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
