the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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