It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
4 words: hood of his car
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
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