I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
