they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize