halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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