Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
