I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
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