I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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