God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize