Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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