Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
i now understand why vodka
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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