The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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