the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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