we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
