Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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