erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I didn't notice because vodka
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
