Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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