I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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