2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Are we still banned from the library?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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